A few months back I met this kid who told me he wanted to be a diplomat. He’s not an official Poly-Sci major and barely even know the inner-workings of how the government ran.
But damn is he smart.
He’s a history major, reads up on the current events of the world and might as well be in love with Nathan Drake or Hon Solo or any other strong male figure that is seen adventuring around foreign lands trying to uncover hidden truths of the world.
He has a vision of himself and yearns for adventure. But he’s anything but unreliable. He’s strong and a lot more secure than he thinks he is. And his mind is just as big as the maps he studies and gazes at in excitement. And I am so proud to call this kid my boyfriend.
When he told me what he really wanted to do was be a diplomat, my outside reaction was “….ummmm ok? How are you gonna do that?” but my inner reaction was “I may have just met the person who is just as crazy as me for wanting to be a blogger, motivational speaker and some day a TED Talk spokesperson”. He matched me, challenged me and forced me to admit to myself the “taboo” dream of pursuing my path as a writer – someone who writes her words as a comfort for anyone who needs a little bit of solace or that person who needs to hear those words that are said just right so that they can go out and carve their own path.
My point of me telling you this story is to remind you (and myself) to never suppress the voice in your head that’s screaming at you to do something that you really want to do, even if you’re scared. And when you find those people in your life that may have something to say that might be a bit “out there”, listen to them, because as they speak, if your mind is going off like a bunch of fireworks in silent agreement of what they are saying, let the fireworks go. DO NOT smother them.
“In a world that wants us to whisper I choose to yell” a quote from Luvvie Ajayi as she speaks about being a domino in a world that stands still.
Be your own domino, and choose to yell.
Sometimes you’re going to be unreasonably mad about something. Sometimes you’re going to want to lash out, or be mean or petty but stop and breathe.
Sometimes thinking puts us on a spiral that we just cant get out of.
So stop and breathe.
We go through life scrolling, trying to pick the perfect song for the perfect moment. Trying to move on to the next post that will make us say “yes me too” “agreed” “dead on”, just so we don’t have to feel alone or feel like we accomplished nothing that day so that we don’t look back at yesterday and say “wow I really wish I did that one thing”.
We are becoming to used to being okay with doing the bare minimum because for whatever the reason, we want to look the part, be the best and already be on top. But if you really sit down and think about it – most of us don’t have the stories or experiences to back us up. We are becoming impatient and want to just have the title or the degree or the accolades just so that we can say we have something, get praise and then move on with our lives. And with a mindset like that, how do we expect anyone to put their faith in us? To invest in us when there’s no credibility to help us stand up.
I once read somewhere, “make sure you’re as happy as your instagram posts make you out to be”, now I’m not sure who said that or if that was even the quote verbatim, but it pretty much gets the point across. We need to start being okay with not posting every detail of our lives for the world to see, because that is super unrealistic if you ask me. We have become a society that is pushing self-confidence when in actuality we are as insecure as ever. If we were secure and confident, we wouldn’t have to let the whole world know about it just so we could see the number of usernames that acknowledged our “confidence”.
If you want to be great, do it. If you want to get something done, do it. Even if it means people don’t know your every move, because sometimes, when we’re forced to be with ourselves- our own thoughts in our own mind, separated from the rest of the world’s comments and critiques- and we be by ourselves for a bit, magic happens. When you’re by yourself, you’re in your purest form and that is what makes your outcome so magnificent.
I have may things to be grateful for.
I’m healthy, I’m young, I’m doing well in my classes.
I have a great job, loving family, great friends and kick-ass boyfriend; an overall fulfilling and meaningful support group.
I do however, need to go to church more. Really take the time to meditate and be thankful for what I have by giving my appreciation up to God. Inner reflection is something of a daily exercise many of us struggle with, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be obtained.
I need to find more sanctuary in my life and stop looking for things to “be upset about”. Life is good. Life is very good and is not to be taken for granted.
I think that’s something we could all benefit from.
The first of many.
As I sit, listening to smooth jazz, wrestling with myself to do homework, my mind races and to scratch that itch to get my thoughts out on to a platform.
So, instead of doing homework, I am here, writing my first ever published words that I am very aware will be public – and I’m so excited about it!!
So here it is, the beginning of many thoughts to come.
I hope through writing, to evolve and hopefully inspire someone in some way shape or form.
So enjoy! I know I will 🙂